Forgot to mention...
Permission given to archive on the FTP page and the new
FKfanfic page.

This is my Valentine’s Day story. It contains spoilers for
the episode “Be My Valentine” (obviously!) and is rated R for
implied notions that would give away the story if I talked
about them now. Many thanks, once again, to the lovely Jean
Graham for beta-reading on short notice and for correcting my
grammar and punctuation. Happy Valentine's Day to all.

Tell Him (1/1)
By Sunny LaCountess

Another night, another dream.

She always came in blue. Strange, because he didn’t remember
her wearing that color in her living days.

Was she beautiful? He remembered her mortal looks, an image
of innocence and white. This apparition was different. She
looked older, full of wisdom, more like a goddess than an
angel. He always felt humbled before it.

“Hello, Lucius!”

“Hello, Fleur! You came again.”

“You called me.”

“I do not remember that.”

“You did. Every time you hurt I hear you, like a scream, like
a plea. It was loud tonight.”

He tensed. Should he deny it? It was obvious that she knew
something.

“Tonight,” he said matter-of-factly, “was Valentine’s!”

“Oh!” she exclaimed. It was not apparent whether she was
surprised because she really didn’t know the date or because
he had assumed she didn’t know it.

“Tell me what happened,” she asked.

“They were planning to go on a date. I interfered.”

“Oh!” Another intake of breath. Her eyes turned sharp.

“Did you… do something?”

“I sent her the invitation first, asked her to come to the
Azure. I couldn’t let her go with him.”

“You couldn’t?”

“No, not on Valentine’s Day. Too romantic.” And I am a
pathetic fool.

“Did she show up?”

“Yes. And, damn, she looked beautiful. How could one resist
such a vision?”

“Right,” she said, a bit hesitantly. Now, what was that?
Jealousy from a goddess?

“What was her reaction, seeing you instead of him?” she went
on.

“I believe she was shocked, at first. After all, it was the
first time we were seeing each other up close, and I had a
feeling she counted me her enemy long before we met. She was
brave, though; I have to give it to her, considering the
imbalance in power.”

“Did you think of hurting her?”

He looked at her sideways. “Is it at all like me to plan on
hurting defenseless women?” Under non-dietary conditions,
that is.

“I didn’t say you were planning to hurt her. I asked if you
*thought* about it.”

“I think about many things. But she turned out to be a most
entertaining companion. It had been a while since I had met a
woman as smart as she is.”

“Wouldn’t that be, for you, a stronger reason to not let her
get away? Didn’t you try to bring her across as soon as you
noticed that?”

“Are you being intentionally sarcastic? Or did I just imagine
your image next to hers?” he said with a raised eyebrow.

She closed her eyes, turning her head away. “I wasn’t talking
about myself. I know why you wanted me. My intelligence had
nothing to do with it.”

Her sadness pained him and he softened his tone for the
reply. “Don’t say that, Fleur. I told you the truth because I
trusted you. If you were anything less than an intelligent
woman I would have let you believe in a lie. But even you
were surprised at my sudden fascination with you. And here is
another truth: even without him in the picture—or especially
without him, since that would have meant no obstacles—I would
have wanted you to be one of us. You were too precious to be
given to your mortal years.”

“I was his female equivalent to you.”

“That was my motive then. Now, I know how special you are all
on your own.”

The confidence in his voice seemed to lift the clouds from
her heart. The blue eyes opened, and she relaxed her
celestial body.

“What about this woman? What will her fate be?” she asked.

“She will live her share of time. He will love her through
it. Then, she will grow old, wither, and die.”

“Unless *he* brings her across.”

“No,” he snapped harshly, a little too harshly, before he
caught himself and returned to his natural poise.

“No,” he said, calmer this time. “He won’t risk his precious
redemption. He denied you the gift and I am sure, he will
deny it her.”

She shook her head mournfully, chanting to herself, “What sad
fates we endure. Caught in the web of our own vows, our
hearts torn between affection for the other and the
hopelessness of those dreams.”

He did not give a reply. He remained silent until she turned
her attention back to him.

“Are you sure he wouldn’t do it under pressure? Vampires are
known to lose control when they are pushed too far.”

“I am sure. I put him in the vice when he showed up at the
restaurant. I dared him to bring her across and he didn’t.
Now, I know he never will, and that is one more seal to put
my mind at ease.”

Her eyes widened in shock. “He came to the restaurant? He
must care for her very much.”

And it was his turn to sulk. “Yes, he must.”

“You really dared him to bring her across?”

“Yes, I wanted to see how far he would go. I demanded that he
show me he didn’t love her.”

“And why on earth should he act on your demand? You don’t
hold that kind of power over him anymore now than you did
back then, when we first met.”

“I reminded him of our bargain.”

“Oh God, Lucius, tell me you didn’t. Please, I asked you not
to.”

“I know, and I never did, until now. I never wanted to use
your sweet memory against him. But this thing with Dr.
Lambert, it unnerves me. She is closer to him than any of the
other mortals. And she is a double-edged sword, holding both
the key to his heart and possibly, to his mortality. It would
be a match made in heaven if they ever got together.”

“I see,” she nodded, “and so, you do all you can to not let
that happen.”

He looked at her face. “Do I have a choice?”

 “You could tell him,” she countered, meeting his gaze.

They stared at each other for another while, until he finally
looked away, speaking two familiar words, “I can’t.”

She came up to him and laid a compassionate hand on his
shoulder. It was strange, considering she was only a dream,
but he could somehow feel warmth flowing from her touch into
his body.

“How long are you going to keep it up, Lucius? How long are
you going to hide behind the shield of bargains and
commandments and unwarranted cruelty? Don’t you think it is
time to try out the truth? To tell him how you really feel
instead of letting the lies push him further away?”

He lowered his head, speaking in a muffled tone. “You know
nothing. After all that has happened between us, the truth
will hold no magic for us anymore. Besides, what if he
already knows the truth and simply doesn’t care about it?
What if he is already using that knowledge against me? Why
else, do you think, does he do all the things to go against
my authority and my pride?”

“Because he needs his independence and his sense of
individuality. He needs to know you genuinely love him, that
you’re not trying to possess him. He wants you as a partner
in life, not as guard in his jail, or the devil on his left
shoulder. But before that can happen, you first have to tell
him how you feel, and let him understand the reasons for the
things you do.” She felt along his arm until her hand reached
his and closed around it.

His only reaction was to raise his head and set his jaw into
a tight line.

“Tell him, Lucius. Believe me, he doesn’t know.”

“If he has not figured it out after all these years, then
perhaps I am terribly misguided in my affections for him. If
he knows and chooses not to act upon it, then nothing I say
or do would change anything between us.”

He turned and started to walk away, marching out of the dream
and back into the real world.

Her voice rose from behind his back, “He might be in love
with you too, you know.”

He ignored her. She was ripping at his heart a little too
much for one dream.

“He could be in the same place as you are, scared, unsure,
denied too many times to dare try again.”

Now he was far enough for her to be just a blue dot on the
horizon. Her voice sounded tiny and distant to his ears.

“When will you tell him, Lucius? When?”

He turned his back, whispering under his breath in the
twilight between the two worlds. “Not as long as I have him,
even if he goes away. Let him run out of fear. Let him run
from disgust, from hatred or from pain. But I will never,
ever, want to see him run from love.”

It was time to rise and shine.

The End

--Sunny LaCountess
February 2003

=====
LaCountess -- Twilight Knightie,IB,DT,UF,Cotk
http://www.lacountess.com/FKnight/

"Vampires are make believe, just like elves and gremlins and eskimos!"
--Homer Simpson