This story is dedicated to my ever faithful beta reader Katherine Robert who asked specifically for a story with this song in it for her birthday. Happy Birthday Kath! I hope this lives up to your expectations. Teach Me Inspired by Jann Arden's song "Insensitive" by StormyNite Written in May of 1998 Timeline: 3rd season prior AtA Part 1 Natalie knelt on the ground by the body. She watched the beautiful blonde woman stand quietly over to the side talking calmly with the uniformed officer. A quick check of the corpse told her the body had been moved to this location. The lack of blood around the body from the ragged wound in the woman's neck made it quite obvious. The blonde apparently had found the body and Nat really needed to speak with her. Nat nodded her head at James Mitchell, the officer taking the woman's statement, and he came quickly to Natalie's side. "I need to speak with her, Jim." She motioned toward the beautiful woman standing back away from the body. "She is the one that found her...correct?" "Yes, Dr. Lambert! I'll bring her right over. She seems awfully calm under the circumstances." He eyed the pretty woman as she stood watching them closely, then he smiled broadly as the woman turned on the charm. James Mitchell responded immediately. "Of course, I could overlook anything SHE'D do as long as she turned those green eyes my way." He puffed out his chest to impress her, then walked away from Nat without a second thought. "Men!" Nat shook her head in disgust. They all responded the same to a pretty face and a body. Nat had to admit the woman was beautiful and a perfect size 5 with big boobs. Why did some women have all the luck? Nat took a quick look at her own chest and sighed in dismay. When she looked up, the blonde was walking toward her. No doubt, no hesitancy, no indecision radiated from the woman as she stopped before Natalie who still knelt on the ground by the body, bagging the victim's hands. "You wanted to see me, Dr. Lambert?" Miriam Coldwell's voice floated around her like a cloud, articulate as well as sensual. Nat eyed her closely. She'd been wrong...size 6 not size 5. Not a man present would be immune to her charm, but Nat wasn't a man. "Yes, Miss Coldwell. I have a few questions for you myself." Nat turned on the professional facade, immune to the soft lilt in the other woman's voice when she spoke. "Tell me if this is the exact position you saw the body in when you first discovered it." Nat pointed to the still form lying on it's side with one leg twisted in an odd position almost behind the torso. Miriam looked at the body, then responded. "Well, now that you mention it...no. She was almost face down when I discovered her, and the leg wasn't twisted back behind her like that either." Shock registered on her face briefly, then she camouflaged it behind a professional face just as Nat had done earlier. She turned off the charm like a switch. "You don't think she was still alive, do you? I just assumed she was...I didn't touch her to confirm it. I guess I should have, but I had to use the cell phone in my car on the other side of that building over there to call the police. It couldn't have taken any longer than 5 minutes for them to get here. I stood over there by my car and waited in case they called back. My phone is fastened in the car and I left them my number. I'd feel really awful if she was still alive and I didn't help her." Guilt washed across the woman's face for a moment, then she tamped it down, letting the professional woman appear again. Nat watched in fascination at how quickly the woman switched personas in front of her, and her curiosity got the better of her. "What is it you do, Miss Coldwell?" Natalie eyed her closely and waited. "I'm an interpreter for the embassy." She nodded toward the building behind Natalie. "I work lots of long hours translating and interpreting German and Japanese for the consulate." Miriam smiled, then almost posed out of habit. Nat watched and made a mental note in things to change in her own professional presentation of her job. The woman was proud of what she did, and it showed. Natalie began to have a grudging respect for the woman's quick mind and attitude in front of adversity. At least the job explained a great deal about how the woman handled trauma and the unusual. She would deal with it on an hourly basis in her job. She would either have to learn to ignore it, or be eaten alive. Apparently Miriam Coldwell thrived on it. "No need to worry, Miss Coldwell. The woman has been dead several hours." Natalie stood and brushed off her slacks, noticing the dirt stains on the knees. She turned to admire Miriam's neat 2 piece suit with the short skirt and perfect legs extending into 2 inch heals. Obviously, she'd either changed clothes earlier or she'd found the woman's perfect suit material that didn't wrinkle. With a twinge of jealousy rearing its ugly head, she decided not to ask. She turned to notice Nick and Tracy pull up in the caddy. Miriam watched Nat's gaze and turned as Nick stepped out of the car. Without thinking, Miriam adjusted her suit, put on a smile and admired the handsome man that approached. "Who is he?" Miriam asked over her shoulder as Nick stopped to get the preliminaries from Mitchell, who stood 30 yards away from them. "He's Detective Nick Knight...Metro Homicide. I'm sure he and Tracy will have a few questions for you, so don't run off." Natalie headed for Jacob who was unloading the corpse cart from the back of the coroner's wagon. Miriam walked toward Nick , Tracy, and Mitchell. She caught Mitchell's eye immediately and smiled. Nick and Tracy turned to greet her. Miriam extended her hand gracefully to Nick. "Miriam Coldwell, Detective." Nick grasped her hand gently and smiled. "Nick Knight..." Nick motioned toward Tracy. "My partner, Tracy Vetter. We have a few questions for you before we go downtown." Nick eyed her closely. The warm and sensual nature of the creature before him pulsed with every beat of her heart, and he responded immediately. ------------- Nat stood beside Jacob as he finished bagging the body and watched Nick out of the corner of her eye. Each motion of Miriam's body was planned and accentuated. To the casual eye, however, it would look perfectly natural, and Nick responded to it just like any other warm blooded male would. If he had been worried about his progress, Nat could certainly assure him that he was acting perfectly human. One who was female oriented, obviously ruled by his libido, and totally sexually driven...and to be honest...it bothered her. She finished watching Jacob and signed off on the paperwork, all the time watching Nick ooze his baby blues all over Miriam. Somehow, she'd hoped he would have been indifferent to Miriam, but apparently, she'd read too much into their relationship again. Nick brushed Miriam's arm and it was like a physical blow to Natalie. He was coming on to her as well. A tear started to form behind her eye and she forced it back, refusing to humiliate herself any further. She picked up her medical bag lying on the ground, and started for her car. Tracy, mumbling to herself, rounded the corner of the car just as Nat opened the door. "Men! They are all alike. They use their third leg instead of their brain!" Tracy glared at Nick and Miriam as they chatted on the other side of the clearing. Soft lilting laughter could be heard coming from Miriam as she posed and reposed in front of Nick for the 10th time. "I can't believe Nick would fall for that. It makes me sick and you can't get a sane word out of any man here. Nick might as well just throw her in the back of the caddy and have his way with her right now and get it over with. Jeez...I thought..." Tracy turned and saw Nat's face as Miriam leaned over and whispered into Nick's ear and he smiled broadly. Pain and something else flashed across Nat's face, then she quickly stepped into the car. "Nat...I'm sure it's nothing. You know men...Nick's just..." Tracy regretted her remarks. Why wasn't she using her head? Of all the things to point out and say. Talk about brain dead...sometimes she wondered about herself, but Nat cut her off. "Yes, I know men...and I thought I knew Nick...I guess I was wrong." Nat stared at Nick briefly then pushed her emotions back where they belonged and became the professional once more. Unfortunately it wasn't fast enough to hide the pain that washed through her, and Tracy caught it. "In any case, Trace, it looks like it was a self inflicted wound, but the body was moved by someone more than once. I won't know for sure until I get the body back to the morgue. I'll be able to tell by the depth, cut pattern and serration of the wound." Nat smiled forcefully and looked at the young blonde before her, then slammed the door of the car and started the engine. Part 2 --------------- Tracy stared at her partner as he walked toward her. Her blue eyes spit fire as Nick walked up and looked around for Nat. Confused by Tracy's hostility, Nick was at a loss. Maybe Nat could fill him in. "So where's Nat, Trace?" Nick decided to lighten his tone and tread easy. Whatever Tracy's problem was, it was directed at him. For the life of him, he couldn't figure out what he'd done to tick her off. He started to play back the evening in his photographic memory and tried to make sense of the anger he felt from his partner. "She left, Nick!" Tracy almost growled in frustration. He wasn't any different than all the rest of them. That's what she got for thinking Nick was different. "As if you really cared!" "Trace, give me a clue here. The last I checked we were still being civilized with each other....and we are still partners. So why don't you take a deep breath..." "Oh, right! Placate her because she's a female." Tracy walked over and stood nose to nose with Nick before she continued. "I wasn't the one thinking with my third leg instead of my head." She glanced angrily at Miriam who stood charming several of the other officers. "You could have just gotten her address and phone number discreetly, instead of flaunting your conquest in front of half the police force and hurting Nat like that." Tracy backed off a bit and slapped her notebook into his chest. "And don't think she didn't notice you turning on that blue-eyed, blond-haired charm of yours on our little tart over there. If you wanted to have sex with the bimbo, you could have at least been a little less obvious." She turned to walk away, then had a second thought. "Oh, I forgot! You and Nat are JUST FRIENDS...at least...YOU are. Have a good night, partner. I'm booking off because I'm suddenly ill." Tracy stomped off toward a unmarked car refusing to ride with Nick. ----------- Natalie gowned up and started the autopsy on the young woman, trying not to think as she methodically went about her tasks. Try as hard as she could, she couldn't stop the tears from forming in her eyes and blurring her vision. It was a useless fight. A single tear slid down her cheek silently followed by another that she couldn't seem to stop no matter how hard she tried. She'd guarded herself for so long, not getting involved because it always ended the same. She'd learned that when she was young. It was always the flirts, the pretty girls, the tall model types who got the good guys, not the ordinary girl with a brain. They were classified as the nerds, the girl you had as your bench partner to help you out...not date. Why did she think Nick was any different? They were friends. He'd said that numerous times but somewhere along the way it had changed for her. It wasn't Nick's fault, it was hers. She'd let herself hope he'd been trying to protect her after the fiasco at the Azure and let herself in for this heartbreak. He'd been telling the truth. You didn't survive 800 years with LaCroix being stupid. Of course, she wasn't suppose to remember any of it, but she had. She'd played it over and over in her mind for days when her memory came back. First she was angry, then she analyzed what had happened and LaCroix's attitude toward her. Nick was protecting her just like he did everyone else but...he was using her, and he'd done it well. Nick had backed off since Valentines Day. She thought it was because of all the events that had transpired, but apparently not. Giving up, Natalie stepped back and tossed the bloody scalpel into the sink behind her. She could barely see, and it bothered her more than she was willing to admit. Just her luck someone would show up wanting a report and she'd be bawling her eyes out, then she'd have to explain. Jill heard the noise and stuck her head through the door from the adjoining room. "You okay, Nat?" She sounded concerned as she spoke. Nat turned her back to her quickly and striped her gloves. "I'm fine, Jill. Just feeling a little nauseous. Must be the flu or something and this isn't helping." She nodded over her shoulder at the body on the table, still not turning to her co-worker while she fought to get the tears under control. "Maybe you should go home." Jill stated hopefully. Nat never took care of herself. It was always the job first...Nat second. "I think you're right, Jill." Finally conquering her emotions and tears, she turned to meet her eyes across the room. "I'm going to call it a night and ask Jerry to finish for me. I've done it enough times for him. He owes me at least this one." Nat sighed sadly, overwhelmed and suddenly very tired. "I'll finish the clean-up in here and call him. You just go on home and I'll put our female guest in the fridge until he gets here." "Thanks, Jill." Nat had already turned and headed for the jacket on the back of her chair. --------------- Nick parked the caddy and almost ran down the hall to the morgue. Tracy had been right. He was an insensitive idiot. It was just so pleasant to have a beautiful woman find the man attractive and not see the beast. He'd forgotten himself and just gone with the feeling. Of course, so had every other male present, but they weren't already involved with someone else. Nick stopped in mid-stride with that thought and smiled. He was involved with Natalie whether he admitted it or not. In fact, he loved her terribly and if LaCroix hadn't made his usual threats and innuendoes about hurting her or bringing her across, he would have told her. He should have told her anyway, but somehow he just couldn't say it out loud, and if it kept her safe from LaCroix, then he had to remain silent. Who was he kidding? He'd kept silent not only out of fear for Natalie, but fear she wouldn't feel the same. After all, she'd seen him at his worst. That was enough to scare any sane person off, why not Nat. He didn't think he could stand losing her friendship or her love if she did the logical thing and run like Hell! So he'd laid back since Valentines Day protecting what they had. Taking a deep breath, he pushed open the morgue door expecting to face an angry Natalie but found only Jill. Jill just shut the fridge door when Nick stepped in. "Where's Nat, Jill?" Nick listened for her familiar heartbeat in vain, but heard nothing. "She wasn't feeling well, Nick. So she went home." Jill eyed Nick closely. If she was guessing her illness had something to due with the blond detective before her. Sometimes she just wanted to smack them both upside the head for being so stupid. So she decided to play a hunch. "Seemed kind of weird, too. I've never seen Nat leave an autopsy half finished. She seemed more than ill. She was upset over something. She does a great job of hiding her feelings, but not tonight. You don't know anything about that? Do you, Nick?" Jill eyed him closely and watched the pain flash across his blue eyes before he tamped that famous cold mask back in place. Yes, there was more to Nick Knight than he let people see....and part of it was Natalie. She was right. "Maybe you should go check on her. I'm sure she went straight home." Jill let the suggestion hang in the air as she watched Nick cover his emotions quickly, then smile. "I'll do that, Jill. Thanks!" Nick turned and headed for the door ignoring the snicker he heard from Jill's lips when the door closed. Within moments of clearing the back door, Nick took to the air. Part 3 ------------- Nat sighed as she pushed open the door and Sydney wrapped his warm fuzzy body around her legs. She bent to pick him up and caress him gently as she walked into the kitchen and reached for his bowl and the cat food in the cupboard. "Well, Sydney, looks like I've done it again. I guess you are just going to have to be my knight in shining armor." Sydney purred loudly and cuddled up next to Nat as she held him. His warmth and genuine affection brought the tears back to her eyes as she cuddled him closer. "At least I know you love me." Grudgingly, she put him down on the floor with his bowl, then wiped the tears off her cheek. "You eat your supper while I take a quick shower, then maybe if you're lucky I'll let you lick my bowl when I'm done." She patted the furry cat on the rump, walked by the stereo, and flipped it on. It was the light rock station that flooded the room when she headed for the shower. After she'd finished her shower, she stopped at the bureau drawer. Finally deciding that the only person who was ever going to see her new teal negligee was herself, she tossed it over her head, relishing the feel of the silky satin texture as it slid effortlessly down her skin. Grabbing the brush from the top of the bureau, she quickly attacked her glorious mane of curls. When she finished, she stared into the mirror and sighed as Sydney bounced up onto the bed behind her. "I guess Syd, that you're the only man who will ever appreciate this." She leaned over and picked him up and cuddled him closely. "At least you don't prefer blondes." She was rewarded with a load purr then a scratchy tongue as Sydney licked her cheek, making her smile. Finally, she grabbed her matching silk robe she'd purchased with the negligee and headed for the kitchen. She popped her dinner in the microwave, then poured a glass of red wine and headed for the couch. Sydney bounced right along beside her as she sipped the red fluid, trying not to let her mind drift back to Nick, but it didn't work. "Well, Lambert it's your own childish fantasy that got you here. You'd think you'd learn. It always ended the same way. You are always good enough for a friend, but nothing more. You would think I'd be use to it by now, wouldn't you, Syd? I'm always the smart one, the one everyone needs help from and I give it. Just once, though, I wish I would find someone who could see that I have needs too. Why did I think it would change this time...because Nick wasn't human?" Nat turned to Sydney as he wrapped himself around her legs while she adjusted the stereo volume and base. "Well, he was sure human and all male tonight. I should be thrilled it was a human response from Nick, but it hurts too much. Of course, he only called me his friend. It's my fault for falling in love with him. Kinda of funny in a way, Sydney. I always told myself it wasn't going anywhere, but when I watched him with that girl tonight, I knew that everything we were doing was working, but I'd lost him. It's always the pretty ones, the ones with the big boobs and the small waist that catch their eye." A tear began to form in her eye and she pushed it back. "Well, at least this one wasn't stupid. Of course, she didn't act it around Nick. Ridiculous, but the girl turned the intellect off and the sex on when Nick walked up. Too bad I didn't learn to do that, then maybe I wouldn't be here at home alone talking to you." She leaned over and picked up Sydney and headed for the couch. "It's time to get a reality check, Syd. Time to go back where I belong." She sat down and tucked her feet underneath her, the soft melodious tones of Jann Arden poured through the speaker as she leaned back into the soft cushions of the couch, letting them cradle her with the warmth of a lovers arms that would never be. How do you cool your lips After a summer's kiss How do you rid the sweat After the body bliss How do you turn your eyes From the romantic glare How do you block....the sound of a voice You'd know anywhere Oh I really should have known By the time you drove me home By the vagueness in your eyes Your casual good-byes By the chill in your embrace The expression on your face That told me you might have some advice to give On how to be insensitive She should turn it off, she knew she should, but something about the song compelled her to let it play. She shouldn't go here...It wouldn't help...It would only make her feel worse and the song played on. How do you numb your skin After the warmest touch How do you slow your blood After the body rush How do you find your soul After you've found a friend How do you teach your heart...it's a crime To fall in love again Tears began to fall silently down her cheeks. She sat the glass of wine on the corner table, stared at the blood red color and gave into the pain she felt in her heart and soul...and the final verse echoed through the room. Oh, you probably won't remember me It's probably ancient history I'm one of the chosen few Who went ahead and fell for you I'm out of vogue, I'm out of touch I fell too fast, I fell too much I thought that you might have some advice to give On how to be...insensitive "Teach me to be insensitive, Nick. Teach me not to love you, to let you go and be the man you were meant to be. Teach me how to stop the pain, to go on with my mortal life without you. Teach me how to stop feeling so alone when you're not here, how to put on the cold mask of indifference and walk away like I don't care...Teach me, Nick...teach me..." The words sobbed from her lips and she gave into the grief and pain of loss while the tears poured from her eyes. ---------------- Nick stood outside the door listening to the words of the song and her sob. He never meant to hurt her. He loved her, couldn't she see that? It was so easy to flirt with the blonde. It made him feel sexy, wanted, desired, but he didn't love her. He could never love her...She wasn't Natalie. It just made him feel human and in doing so, he'd hurt the one person he'd sworn never to harm. The one person who'd given him hope and love unconditionally. The one person who made him whole after all these centuries. He was such an idiot. The music echoed through his mind as her sobs tore at what was left of his soul. He should leave her to move on, to let her start over with someone who could love her as she deserved...but her pain was his. The words she spoke ripped him apart until he couldn't take it anymore. Part 4----ADULT She sobbed into her hands as the tears continued to flow unchecked. "Teach me, Nick...not to care. Teach me to be cold...insensitive." He appeared before her through her tear-filled, blurry eyes. "Just go away, Nick. I can only have you in my dreams, and that's not enough anymore. I'm tired of being the strong one...The one who's just the friend...The one who is foolish enough to conjure you up like a schoolgirl dream and pretend, just once, that we aren't...just friends." She stared at him like he wasn't there but only in her mind, and the tears continued to rack her small body. "Go away, Nick. I'm a big girl now, and the dream isn't enough anymore...I have to go back to reality, to what I truly am. What I've always been to you....a friend." Pain tore at her soul because what she needed and wanted could never be hers and somehow she had to come to terms with it. "Just teach me to be insensitive to how I feel, then you can finally disappear and I won't conjure you up anymore. I won't fantasize there can be something more." She dropped her head into her hands, then curled into a ball and wept. Nick's heart broke when he listened to her words realizing she thought he was only a dream. Her pain washed over him until it took his breath away. She dreamed of him just as he did her. They'd been fools to let this go this far without talking about it. He'd pushed her away to protect her because he loved her, only it hurt her instead. It had hurt them both. "Natalie..." Nick sat down on the couch and pulled her small form into his lap and cradled her there. Out of pure need to take the pain away he caressed her back and pulled her hair away from her face. Softly he kissed her forehead, then her eyes and finally her soft lips. The warmth and feeling of love he'd always felt from her was laced with so much pain, so much torment...and it was all his fault. "Natalie, oh please...Nat. Let me take the pain away...let me love you." He kissed her harder now with the need to make them whole. She opened her mouth and gave into him. The sweet taste of her mouth, the salt on her lips cried out with a need that only he could fulfill, and he craved it. He wanted to give her what she needed. His cool lips caressed hers and she gave into the dream. He kissed her passionately and begged for forgiveness. She wanted the dream to go on forever. When he scooped her up and headed for the bedroom, she prayed she would never wake up. He laid her down on the soft comforter and stretched out on top of her. He let his hands caress her and cherish every inch of her body in the silky negligee. The feel of her warmth through the coolness of the silk made him ache to feel her bare skin beneath him and his lips found hers once more. She felt so hot under his fingertips and the desire of the man overtook the needs of the vampire. Nat gave into the fantasy and ran her hands over his hard body, letting each finger caress and love every inch of the man on top of her. Slowly, she slipped her tongue inside his mouth and her hands inside his shirt. The hard planes of his chest and the fine soft hair made her groan with desire. She wanted more and if you were going to fantasize, why not go all the way? Do everything she'd ever dreamed of doing and more. It was her dream and she should enjoy it. She ripped his shirt open then ran her hands over the flat of his stomach and sucked hard on his bottom lip only to return and plunder the sweet recesses of his mouth once more. He groaned in pleasure as her hands found his hard cock and kneaded him softly through his tight jeans. Each stroke brought a gasp from his lips, and he grew larger in her hands as he pushed into them. Her mouth kissed down his neck and nuzzled him at the base of his throat and he groaned again with a different need. Without thinking she pushed him over onto his back and followed with her body on top of his. She reached up and stripped the negligee and robe off, then straddled him. "Nat..." Nick reached up to her unable to take his eyes off her. She was so beautiful, and the heat that radiated from her as well as her siren heartbeat, beckoned the vampire within. Her skin was so soft and her breasts perfect. He watched in fascination as he teased her nipples until they hardened under his touch. He needed to taste her, to put his mouth where his hands were, to worship her breasts until they begged for release. He pulled her toward him. He lifted himself up and kissed her swollen lips, then licked his way down her neck to her breasts until the soft sweet nubs he'd excited earlier with his hands were now his to taste. He suckled her breast until she whimpered and pulled his head hard against her breast demanding more for the other soft mound that was left unattended. The feeling of his lips on her breasts was not enough. She wanted more. She wanted the dream to never end. Without hesitation, she tore his shirt off him, then pushed him back flat on the bed once more. He growled in protest until she pressed her soft smooth skin next to his and slowly lifted her upper torso across his chest. His own nipples responded, and she licked and sucked them into her hot, wet mouth making him gasp. His hands caressed her sides, then her ass. She sucked and twirled the hard buds of his nipples in the wet recesses of her mouth, while she rubbed her naked thighs and soft mound on his growing manhood, restrained under his tight jeans. She finally released his hard buds, as her hands worked on the zipper to his jeans and slowly tasted every inch of his neck driving him insane. "Natalie...tell me you know what you're doing...tell me..." Nick gasped between breaths as her lips captured his in total possession and her hands pushed his jeans over his hips. Desire raged within Nick and the feel of her hot, naked body on his cool skin was rapidly making him lose control. Her hands wrapped around his shaft and he screamed in pleasure as she stroked him to his full length. With great effort he pulled his lips from hers. "Nat, you have to stop this...we have to stop..." "NO!" She growled into his ear. This time I'm in control and you are mine. I am going to make you want me so bad that you will never want another woman. I'm going to make you beg me to release you, then I'm going to let you feel everything that I am, everything that I want. Just as I have always dreamed." She stood quickly, then pulled his jeans free from his hips. She stood at the foot of the bed and admired his perfect form and his erection, now throbbing in need. She knelt on the bed and slowly kissed his inner thigh, letting her fingertips lightly caress his groin, yet not touching his hard staff. She let her breast just barely touch the skin of his calves and sensually let her tongue follow the same motion on his thigh as her breasts moved over his calf. Alternating between soft and hard pressure with her breast and tongue she wove a path to his manhood, never once letting her fingertips touch his pulsing shaft. He bucked in frustration as the warmth and heat from her lips and tongue fueled the fires of desire deep within him. A low growl emanated from his chest as he became frantic in need and grabbed her hand. Too quick for him, she pulled free and raked a sharp nail down his groin to his inner thigh, causing it to bleed. The exquisite pain of pure carnal lust shot through him as her lips sealed the scratch with her tongue and she sucked his blood into her mouth. "Natalie........No!!!!!!!" He sat up quickly only too late to stop her from ingesting his blood. Ripples of pure pleasure ripped through him and the blue of his eyes now glowed amber with the bloodlust of the vampire, but she ignored it. "What have you done, Nat?" Nick threw back his head in pleasure as he supported himself with his arms while her lips sucked every tiny drop of the blood from the scratch on his groin. She worked closer and closer to his shaft, then let her finger softly trace his shaft to the tip. Nick lurched and grabbed her arms to stop the torture her mouth and fingers were creating. She smiled wickedly when her blue eyes met his gold ones. "Enough, Nat...enough!" He pulled her lips back to his. Her hand worked free and grabbed his hard shaft and pumped hard as his tongue dueled with hers. The groan from his lips brought a satisfied smile as she kneaded and massaged his full length. He released her arms to run his fingers through the auburn mane of fire that he had dreamed of so many times before. She continued to caress the entire length of him, making him harder and longer than he ever known possible. She broke free from his lips and watched the blatant desire burn brightly in his golden eyes as she squeezed his balls gently while he massaged his fingers through her hair. Nick's fangs had dropped and they fascinated her. Ever so carefully she brought her lips back to his and let her tongue trace each one to it's full length. He gasped and she smiled. "I wonder which is more sensitive to my touch?" She pulled hard on his shaft and licked one of his fangs until he groaned in anticipation and sought to pierce her lip with his fang. She pulled back quickly and bent over, taking his hard shaft deep within her hot, wet mouth. Unprepared for the sensation, Nick fell back on his elbows as the warmth washed through him in waves of pleasure and he screamed her name. He pushed into her mouth and she sucked hard, alternating with the soft slick feeling of her tongue wrapped around his shaft caressing it all the way down until she deep throated him. He felt himself lost in a wave of pleasure as she pulled blood semen to the tip of his penis, then licked it off. Nick watched in amazement as her head worked over his shaft giving him such pleasure and drinking in everything his body had to offer her. Wave after wave of pleasure ripped through him until he thought he'd gone mad with need. "Nat!!!!! Please...I'm begging you...help me..." He said between gasps. She rose from his groin, then slowly licked the bloody fluid around the corners of her mouth as he watched, fascinated. "No, Nick. I'm not finished with you...not yet." She pushed him back down on the bed as he tried to pull her lips back to his. Effortlessly she straddled his hard shaft and sat down, letting it's hard tip rub her mound and clit on the way down. She grabbed the shaft with soft fingers and ground it hard against her as she rose slowly, then seated herself once more. She played with the head of his shaft and ground it hard into her clit pulling her labia around his shaft but refusing him full entry. He writhed in frustration and the vampire surged forth. "Nat...anything...please!" He reached for her breasts and pulled her forward till his lips found the tight buds they sought. He sucked them first hard, then gently, until his fangs sliced the delicate tissue and blood flowed freely from the cut. Her scent filled the room and his lips latched onto her bleeding breast and sucked all that she was into him with no regrets as he sheathed himself deep within her. A cry of pleasure tore from her lips as he buried himself within her. She rocked forward onto his shaft as he licked the wound over her breast until it healed. Fulfillment and love washed over her as he suckled at her breast, taking her all into him at once. She wanted more...needed more as she ground her pelvis onto his. Feeling the desire in her blood and sensing her needs, he quickly flipped her over and pulled his shaft almost out, rubbing her clit on the way causing her to gasp, then whimper. Quickly he thrust back within her burying himself deeper and deeper with each stroke, making her scream his name this time. Each thrust caused such exquisite pain in both of them, that time stood still as they balanced on the precipice of an eternity of denial and frustration. As he pounded himself deep within her, he leaned over and cradled her head in his hands and watched her eyes fill with love and desire for him. "Come with me, Natalie. Be one with me. Let me show you how much I love you." He gasped as her body began to contract around his hard shaft, and she gave into her own orgasm. Unable to stop the inevitable, he pushed deep within her and pumped harder. Sensing his need, she watched him fight his own beast. "I love you, Nick. Make us one!" She pulled his mouth to her neck without a second thought. His body exploded within her as he planted his fangs deep within her neck. Love flooded his senses and a warmth he'd never known engulfed his cold heart. He drank deeply until the pleasure they each felt became one and the beast was satisfied. Afraid he'd taken too much, he pulled free from her neck only to have her pull him back. A soft whimper greeted his ears as he tried to pull away. He nuzzled and licked her neck until she got control of all the new sensations flooding her system, then relaxed. Once the first rush of pleasure subsided, Nick gave into the feeling of Natalie within him. His betrayal and the pain she'd felt when he'd come on to Miriam tore at his heart. The feelings of love and hope were interlaced between everything he felt from her, based on a faith in him that he found hard to explain, and then...doubt. Doubt that what she was feeling, what had happened between them was anything but a dream on her part, and she would eventually wake up and be alone. A wave of fear and desolation touched him and he gasped at the enormity of how alone she'd felt in what they'd been doing. How she felt that her feelings for him were so one sided, and that everything he'd said at the Azure on Valentine's Day had been true. Part 5-ADULT "Nat?" Nick gently touched her face and pulled her hair out of her face. Tears ran down her face and her eyes remained closed tight. "Nat...open your eyes...please? I'm here. I'm really here." He grabbed her hand and rubbed it down his face in an effort to force her to believe what she felt. "No, Nick. I'll open my eyes and you'll be gone. It will all be a dream and I'll have to live with..." "Nat!" He refused to let go of her hand and nipped her with his fangs to make her open her eyes. "Look at me. Touch me. I'm real...you're real. What we just did is real...and I love you!" He kissed the palm of her hand as her eyes slowly opened. "I was stupid tonight. I didn't think. It just felt so good to do something normal and not have the beast rear its ugly head. I never meant it to hurt you, only love you. Only that could get you killed, and we both know it. If LaCroix or the enforcers don't kill you, I could." He hung his head in regret, then took a deep breath. "I should have left a long time ago, let you get on with your life and make you forget, but I'm not strong enough. You're the reason I've learned to feel again, to be more human, and I guess that means...I have used you." He looked at her to see if she understood and saw pain. That's not what he wanted her to feel and it tore at him body and soul. She stood and tried to pull away, but he stopped her. "Look at me, Nat! Listen to me!" "No, Nick. Let me go. I understand...I understand everything now." She pulled harder, but he refused to let her go. "Nick, please this is humiliating enough. Don't make it worse. I know you just love my strength and humanity, but you have yours back now, or at least you will have in a few years. You don't have to stay around me anymore. There will be lots of beautiful woman to keep you company, and they won't even notice the vampire. You don't need me anymore. You don't need the dowdy little nerd to keep your libido in check anymore." Tears poured down her cheeks as she stood naked before him and straightened her shoulders with pride. She glared first at the hand on her wrist, then into his blue eyes. Pulling her forcefully back into his arms, he wrapped his arms around her protectively, then held her warmth next to him until she stopped struggling. "I will always need you, Nat, because I love you. It's not the safest thing for you...but I love the whole package just as it is. And the package doesn't have to be a size 6 and blonde to attract me. You are the most beautiful woman I've ever known in 800 years, because you're pretty both inside and out...and you love me...Nicholas de Brabant and the vampire. You're not frightened or influenced by the vampire's charisma or the man's blue eyes. You want all of me, not just part. No one has ever wanted that before. No one has ever trusted me enough to control the vampire or accepted me with all those little problems included. You make me whole and I can't live without you. I don't want to live without you." He'd finally put into words what he'd felt since the day he awoke on that morgue table and she hadn't run away. When he released her arms and she didn't move, he gently traced her lips with his fingertips letting everything he felt show in his eyes. The facade of Nick Knight was gone and the man stood before her naked in both body and soul. "Let me show you how much I love you, how much I want you. Then if you want me to leave, I will." Slowly he brought his lips to hers and kissed her softly. She stood motionless and hesitated as his lips moved down her neck. His lips felt so good, and she wanted to believe him. She wanted to let herself believe that this wasn't a dream, and Nick truly did care. Her mind fought for control, but her body responded immediately. Sensing her acceptance and need, he pulled her back into bed. This time, he was in control. This time she belonged to him and a part of her reveled in it. Each touch was one of desire and something else. Each kiss held passion and love, and he lost himself in the scent of what was only Natalie. He rolled her nipples between his fingertips until they hardened, then finally replaced the soft feathery touch of his fingers with his lips. He sucked gently at first and she was lost. She ran her hands over his shoulder into his silky blond hair and encouraged his efforts. Each stroke of his tongue enflamed her, each touch of his fingers made her want more. He stopped teasing her breast and moved downward until she writhed in anticipation and desire. He separated her labia with his fingers and wet her with her own juices. Her scent enveloped him and he gasped in anticipation. He wanted to taste all that she was, all that was Natalie as she gave herself into passion and love. She'd let him glimpse it before, and he wanted it again. He would die without it and his heart knew it. He kissed her soft mound and let his tongue taste the sweet nectar that beckoned to him even stronger than her blood. He found her clit and sucked gently until she moaned in the agony of denial, then she pushed his head harder into her core. He lapped at the juices she let flow freely and his tongue plunged deep within her wet core, but it wasn't enough for either of them. Quickly he nicked her clit with his fang and sucked gently. A rush of hot desire filled with pleasure coursed through them both and she screamed his name in frustration. "Nick...come to me...please...I can't take it any more. I need you inside of me. I need all of you..." Natalie writhed beneath him as he nicked her again and sucked harder driving her insane with need along with himself. He released her and dragged his hard, cool, naked body along hers as she had done to him earlier. He rested above her, hot with desire, and a need only she could fulfill...but he had to know. With his lips only inches from hers, and his hard shaft pressed hard against her clit he asked. "Do you believe I love you, Natalie?" He thrust with his hips but pulled back when she pushed onto him. "Tell me you love me...all of me...vampire and man." His lips came closer as his whispered the question he feared the most. "Tell me you won't send me away. That you'll stay with me forever." He waited, filled with hope that this beautiful creature truly loved him body and soul. She could feel the tension within him and the need for her honesty. He knew what was in her blood. The vampire knew the answers, but the man needed the words. She traced her tongue across his lips that were so close, then she lifted slightly to kiss him solidly. Her tongue plunged into his mouth and he gave into their needs and sheathed himself within her. He broke the kiss and stared into her blue eyes filled with love, and she spoke the words he needed to hear. "Love me, Nick, as I love you...now and forever." She reclaimed his lips as her body responded to his. He plunged deep within her and they both gave into the emotions kept at bay for so many years. Each stroke made him need another and the friction brought such pleasure he thought he would die. Her body craved his, but did her mind? The man couldn't deny the woman of his heart no matter what happened tomorrow. Tonight they were one as they should have been so long ago. They rode the waves of pleasure with each stroke, each giving and taking from the other until her body demanded release and gave into the love and the man who held her heart and soul. "Make me one with you, Nick. Come with me." Her body screamed out in release as her body contracted around his shaft driving him over the precipice along with her. He plunged deep within her, crying out her name with his release and exploded deep within her hot core. A feeling of warmth and love he'd long forgotten poured from his loins into her, and exhaustion overcame him along with a feeling of incredible peace. He rolled over and pulled her with him. She gave into the contentment and love that overshadowed everything else in her life. No sooner had he ensconced her in his embrace, he felt the starving beast surge forth. Terror gripped his heart as he fought for control of the creature who craved the blood of the one thing he loved more than life. He stiffened and waged war with himself. "It's alright, Nick." She pulled his lips to her neck. "Teach me to be a part of you, to understand all that you are, to let us truly become one. Let the vampire love me too, Nick, and I'll teach you both how to love for eternity." Her blue eyes met golden ones and he kissed her softly, then he brushed the hair from her face and neck with such gentleness that bespoke the love in his heart. "Forever, Nat...I will hold you to that." His fangs gently pierced her skin and they became one once more. The End All Comments to: StormyNite**nitewind@www.plantnet.com** **NN Packer to the End ** Hopelessly Hopeful Romantic** **Light Cousin***MadNatter*** X-File DieHard***Xenite**GWDFC** ******Only Love is Forever and Death Shall Have No Dominion******* >http://www.geocities.com/Area51/2012 FK SciFi Window >http://www.geocities.com/Area51/2012/Fiction.html StormyNite Fiction